Entry title: haunting past, fear for the future...
Date / Time : Thursday, February 5, 2009 / 7:50 AM
Everbody has their past.. the things they have done, good .. and bad.. the people they like, the ppl they hate..or ven moments tht they vow not to forget... i have a past which tht actually haunts me.. Well, dont get the wrong idea on the word 'haunt' its just has taken the confident away from me and i dont even recognise who am i anymore.. These few days has been the darkest and longest days of my life, i have been thinking on what i have done and the things that happen in the past. Everyone tht knoe me, recognise me as the girl with confident, strong and is always happy no matter what.. some even think that im a really capable person on duty . Of course there are people that know me as a jerk and a control freak.. but well, thts wat ppl say..Honestly,deep inside, im just so tired and hoping to get out of all those image and be myself..No matter how hard i try, things that happen in the past continue to haunt me and pull me back, its everything in my life, my family,my love life, my friends, even my character. I really hate ppl that view me as someone that owns everything that i want. it sure does looks like tht on the surface, but im really tired of hiding beneath it.. i want to face all my oast and stop running away from it.. im too tired.. i just hope to have a teenage life and not to bear great resposiblities at this age..now, even my future is uncertain.. i dont even have any aim for my life anymore.. i just felt tht everything is breaking into pieces.. im scared, scared of not walking out of my own shadow....
